9 Holiday Anthems for Digital Marketers

Columnist Alan Cutter shares his versions of holiday songs sure to have the digital marketer humming - and nodding - along.

Enjoy a bit of industry humor and holiday music as us media folks celebrate this year. Hum along at your cube — you know you want to!

“Sleigh Ride”

Just hear those registers running,
ka ching, ka ching too,
Come on, it’s lovely weather
For a full site takeover with you,

Outside the rates are falling,
And pubs are calling, “Ya-hoo;”
Come on, it’s lovely weather
For a home page takeover with you.

Campaigns Running on a DSP (“Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire”)

Campaigns running on a DSP,
Agencies knocking on my door;
Although it’s been said many times, many ways,
A very Merry Metrics to you!

“Jingle Bells”
Oh vid-e-o, vid-e-o,
Click through all the way;
Oh what fun it is to ride
In a pre-roll CPA… Hey!

shutterstock-157220042

“Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!”

(the prayer of digital sales people everywhere)
“Let it Close, Let It Close, Let it Close.”

“It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas”

It’s beginning to look a lot like Google, everywhere you click.
See Mountain View’s wise men,
Acquiring once again,
more companies like D-Click.

“Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer”

YouTube, the Google cash cow,
Brought in very many views;
But if you ever analyzed it,
You would even say old news!

“Do You Hear What I Hear?”

Said the millennial to his girlfriend,
Do you hear what I hear?
Raging through the Net;
Data privacy going away;
Do you hear what I hear?
The NSA
Eavesdropping on our call,
Do They Hear What We Hear?

“Dreidel, Dreidel, Driedl, I Made it Out of Clay”

I have a little campaign;
I made it out of air.
And when it’s beta tested,
My numbers will compare.

Oh campaign, campaign, campaign,
Cross-platform all the way!
And when its runs I’m hoping
The clients, they shall pay!

“Jingle Bell Rock”

Super bowl, Super Bowl, Super Bowl ads;
Super Bowl rates in stratosphere land;
4 million dollars for one quickie spot;
Fox hits its jackpot!

“The Night Before My Campaign”

Twas the eve of my campaign, and all thru my team,
Not a demo was missing, not even males fourteen.
The campaigns were teed up on the DSP with care,
In hopes that the click throughs would soon be there.

Come CPA, CPC, performance all the way.
Come pre-roll, authenticity, verify please today.
Now click thru, click thru, please click thru all!

Good tidings we bring from AC Lion!
We wish you a Merry Metrics and a Happy New Year.

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